tumblring to speak out!

i miss you

This three words is commonly said by couples. For me, when there’s someone who romantically said, “I miss you”, it is a kind of legalization that we are matter for him.

I found that sometimes this phrase is kinda… sensitive.

How many times you say that to your lover? If you said that a few times, maybe your lover will ask, “do you miss me all this time? I never heard you say that to me for a long time.” If you said too much, maybe this will come out, “what the hell? i just met you an hour ago.” And then you can argue about who love who the most.

On the other side, like i said on my twitter account earlier. “Sometimes, saying I miss you makes me feel sadder that before.” It is true. It happened to me once. I remember I put blanket all over my body with a melancholic mood, thinking about how much I miss him.

Sometimes, I am scared to let him know. If I send my “I miss you” so many times, he will think that maybe I am not the kind of woman who can’t be left or I can’t be independent etc etc. Or my another concern is that the acknowledgement will make him sad.

Well, missing someone is a good thing. I never forget how relieved I am, after exhausting days, finally I met him. The best thing is seeing him smiling too when he knew I was coming. It just felt… beautiful.

I miss him. Do you miss someone now? :)

Best live version of Justin Timberlake’s Mirrors.

Real beauty :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpaOjMXyJGk

Unexpected flower bouquets! Thanks guys! :) #graduation

Everything has its dynamic

We will not always happy, right?

There will be some difficult times or circumstances, make us to be not as fun as usual. That’s what God tries to say through the color of black and white.

I feel I really awful facing this “bad” dynamic with another person, for example: conflict or misunderstanding. I mean, I really worry that everything will not turn well in the end. What if, what if, what if…. Assumption is just killing me all the time.

“You shouldn’t think too much”, he said once.

Well, I feel the first dynamic in this “friendship”. Honestly, I freaked out. Wondering how we can get through this dynamic. I realize (specifically) that when it comes to someone I care about, I always try too hard to be perfect in front of him, so I can ensure myself I will always have him.

“Love doesn’t work that way, honey”, said my best friend.

It is my time to learn how to solve this insecurity issue, because as I am getting older, I know I can’t keep myself this way forever.

Because loving is about compromising and accepting whatever I am and whatever he is.

Hello again! #research #proposal

April 2013! Can’t wait!

I can say, for the last 3 years, I have an issue toward relationship. Since I had some bad experiences about it, I thought that romantic relationship is something hard to have and maintain. I imagined it will be exhausting to have a man at your side.

I thought.

I still have no idea about this man, but he gave me a hint. He gave me hope that there’s a man who will struggle so hard to adjust and compromise together with me. He gave me the possibility having a beautiful romantic relationship. He also gave me a clue that two people can get through anything ahead.

I never been this happy before.

"The (500) Days of Summer attitude of “He wants you so bad” seems attractive to some women and men, especially younger ones, but I would encourage anyone who has a crush on my character to watch it again and examine how selfish he is. He develops a mildly delusional obsession over a girl onto whom he projects all these fantasies. He thinks she’ll give his life meaning because he doesn’t care about much else going on in his life. A lot of boys and girls think their lives will have meaning if they find a partner who wants nothing else in life but them. That’s not healthy. That’s falling in love with the idea of a person, not the actual person."

Joseph Gordon-Levitt (via theflowershop)

(Source: la-belle-laide, via philadelphilia-deactivated20130)

another person heals

some people said the cure of a broken heart is someone new.

damn, that’s true.